So you open Lyft (because Uber is being a little bitch and jacking up the prices at lunch time on a Tuesday), and you order your driver. He gets there pretty quickly — his name is Billi, by the way — and he’s driving a white Chevy Tahoe.
*You open the door, and I GOT THE KEYS, KEYS, KEYS, I GOT THE KEYS, KEYS, KEYS is playing from the speakers. GET IN, BOY the voice screams.*
“What’s up, I’m Billi.”
“Oh, you’re DJ Khaled. I need to see my mother in the hospital.”
“Love. That’s major. A major key.”
“She’s dying, DJ Khaled.”
“Billi. Call me Billi.”
“RIGHT TURN ALERT”
“Bill- DJ Khaled, I haven’t eve-“
“Billi. I’m a locksmith named Billi.”
“I haven’t even put my seatbelt on.”
“They don’t want you to be safe. So be safe. Lyft: the ONLY way to ride around New York City.”
“it’s right up here on the left, Billi.”
“U-TURN ALERT. I hope you enjoyed your ride. And I hope your mother lives long. Here are these flowers. I love them. I love you. I love your mother. Bless up.”
“Th.. Thanks, DJ Khaled. That really mean a lo-“
“NEW RIDE ALERT. Get out. I’ve got work to do. This next rider ain’t ready, boy.”
*You get out. Jay Z stumbles over his words as
DJ Khaled Billi drives away*
DJ Khaled took Lyft riders on undercover rides. Most riders knew who he was because, as Khaled says, “this is what happens when you’re too iconic.”
Posing as Billi, a locksmith with all the keys, Khaled took riders around New York City for an entertaining addition to Lyft’s undercover driver series.
Watch the segment below.